Sunday, January 31, 2010

Quick thoughts in a short time

I am sitting in my living room on a fabulous, West Coast January day. My kitties are stretched out in the little patches of sun which make it through my north facing window and I have (more or less) successfully completed two weeks of the six week 'learn to run' program I suckered myself and THR into. It has not been without its ups and downs--the first Friday a nagging calf muscle turned it into a speedwalking outting, this past Friday a siezed back muscle turned it into a laydown with the heating pad--but for the most part I'm proud of the effort that I've put into it. I really don't know if I would haven't gotten this far without the addition of THR with me. 'Planning on doing' and 'actually doing' are two very different things and it would be very easy to have never gotten out of the planning stage if I didn't have someone else I was responsible to in this whole ordeal. I've also really come to enjoy the social aspect of the work out. I forgot how much chatter can go on during the walking portions (the running portions, the chatter is pretty much all her and I 'gaa-waa-gaa-waa' beside her).

Clothing is fitting better (again) and that's always a very positive reinforcement. It's nothing huge--no big numbers--but any little thing that helps keep the motivation up there is a good thing. At one point today, I looked down for no particular and noticed that I had to lean forward to see my stomach. Given the size of my boobs that isn't a huge achievement, but the fact that at one point I didn't have to lean forward means something to me. It means all these little changes are adding up.

For all my good intentions, food is still my biggest challenge. I like food, it's part of the reason I am this way. I'm trying to eat healthier and make better choices, but then we have food day at work and a few chips here and a few chips there... My ability to say no to these unhealthy foods that I do love is pretty much non-existent. It's something I know I must work on in the coming weeks/months. I run an inner dialouge pretty much everytime I eat something I know I shouldn't be that doesn't seem to stop me. Perhaps an outer dialouge while other people are around... a few slaps across the face, perhaps some hair pulling... there's potential in there for a great way to motivate myself, I'm sure of it.

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